things have been changing of late in the
glasses-kitchen. one crazy day early
this year, john wayne (or was it clint eastwood?) walked in, said something
about “howdy” and “purty lady” (i giggled, according to the script). but then he said that the times they were
a-changing, and that the winds of change were blowing a different tune (cowboys
always mix their metaphors). i raised my
finger to the wind, in a most dramatic way, to sense what was going on, and i
felt it. and sure enough, since then
it’s been a wild & wacky medical ride for this aspiring cook. for better or for worse, this has led to me
changing the way that i’m eating (or, more importantly, cooking).
pain or icky-meds not being an option, i became
determined to try to find another way. i asked
my sweet sous chefs their thoughts.
“whack-a-back, jo; smack-a-jack, yo…” said nikki minaj. too true, said i, that WOULD be a sucky way
to live. macklemore was a sweet and
inspirational shoulder to cry on, threw some rhymes like the ceiling could not,
in fact, hold him, but offered no greater insight. so, instead i turned to the thing that has
nourished, inspired, and fed my soul as much as my body over the years. i turned to food. i decided to steel myself for potential
mockery from peers, from derisive side-eyes in restaurants, and for the bummer
realization that i wouldn’t be making homemade pasta anytime soon: i gave up
the magic carpet ride that is gluten.
but you know what? so far so good. i’m back to being able to use a can opener
again (and, more importantly, a corkscrew).
i’m back to being able to participate in full-on street-fights, instead
of mere slap-fests. …well, in my
scrappy mind, at least. you know, such
as when you hold the door open for someone who refuses to say thank you, and you then
embark upon a 15-minute fantasy of kicking their boorish behinds (when in
actuality just mutter “you’re welcome” in an acerbic manner. that’ll show them! aholes…)
back to it. rather
than wallowing in the dearth of wheat that is my new culinary map, i’m thinking
of it as a challenge. i challenge myself
to not notice a difference in taste, in texture, in the general gastronomic
existence that is my life. and though i
have yet to find a GF pasta that doesn’t resemble overcooked cardboard, i feel
like i’m well on my way. i don’t claim
to be an authority in the field, nor a pioneer in the research; i’m merely
trying to traverse the gluten minefield that is my new menu plan. it might not be forever, but it is right
now. and the fact that i could type all of this
using my fingers makes it completely worth its while.
gluten, for now at least, is my bitch, bitch. word…
my new favourite GF endeavours… (the first of a series)
brown rice quiche with chicken, kale, and preserved lemon
gluten free girl, sounding somewhat like a superhero (and,
trust, i have a soft spot for that), seems to have some good instincts in the
culinary world. go forth, GFG, and rid
the world of the Wheated Warrior! this
is her quiche recipe, using brown rice for the crust. love it.
maybe i didn’t form my crust quite right, but i’d probably use about
half the filling next time. spillage... but still, deeeeelicious. (more so than a speeding freight train!! dum dum DUMMM!)
here’s the recipe, linked from elsewhere. my fingers might be getting better,
but they're still starting to hurt after all this typing, so here we go:
and, for what it's worth, those lemons... oh, those lemons... i put them on burgers, on salads, in omelets, sometimes i just snack on them out of the jar. because, goddammit, i love food. i enjoy the deliciousness. i am (mostly) gluten free, hear me roar!!
